I thought we were past this stage.
Our youngest is 4. Our oldest is 7. We’re out of diapers, out of nap schedules, and away from everything always going in someone’s mouth. Now we have school drop-offs, sports, real conversations, and kids who can get their own snacks.
And then surprise….We’re having another baby.
The Shock (and the Mindset Shift)
I had time to spare waiting for dance class to be over, so I ran to Target to grab a test. I couldn’t wait to find out if I was or not, so I took it in the bathroom, and sent Eric a picture of the positive test. I won’t pretend I instantly glowed with happiness. My first reaction was disbelief, followed by a mental inventory of everything we’d already moved on from, physically, emotionally, and very practically. Honestly, I thought we had our lives figured out and I was scared how a new baby might change those plans.
We had closed this chapter and even sold all our things.
But once the shock wore off, something unexpected happened: acceptance and excitement.
Instead of spiraling into “we’re starting over,” I changed my mindset. I realized that we’re not starting from scratch, we’re starting with experience. This isn’t the end of a chapter, but the beginning or something even more amazing.
I have already accepted that this baby is just along for the ride for all the big kids activities!
Telling the Kids
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This was the part I worried about most.
We kept it simple and did a simple reveal. I ordered Aurdi a big sister shirt, and asked Graham to open the package; pretending that I forgot what I ordered. He read it and knew right away what it meant.
Their reactions? Pure joy. Like, immediate excitement! No concerns, just smiles, hugs, and approximately one million questions.
Our daughter now asks about the baby every single day. “How big is the baby today?”, “When is the baby coming?”, “What will the baby eat?”, “Can the baby play with me?”. We also check my pregnancy app to figure out weekly the size of the baby, comparing them to different sized fruit.
When You’ve Given Everything Away…
Here’s the irony: we were confident we were done. Confident enough to sell or give away most of the baby gear; crib mattress (thank goodness my mom had bought our original crib, so it was stored in her attic for safe keeping), the bassinet, the stroller, the pack n play, the loungers, the play mats, the bottles, the bibs, the gadgets you swear you needed but barely used.
At first, this felt overwhelming. Starting over? Rebuying everything? Re-entering a phase we thought we’d officially graduated from?
But there’s also something freeing about it. We’re more relaxed this time, and feel less stress to be the perfect parents with the newest stuff. We are trying to borrow from friends, find free stuff on Facebook, and buy from consignment sales.
Turns out, perspective is a great replacement for excess baby gear. I’ve narrowed it down to just the essentials this time around!
What I’m Learning
Here’s what I’m learning:
1. You can be surprised and grateful.
2. You can be overwhelmed and excited.
3. You can be a little sad about the chapter you closed and genuinely curious about the one unfolding.
This pregnancy wasn’t planned, but it’s already such an amazing thing. It has helped to remind us that love doesn’t divide, it multiplies (even when the age gaps are bigger than expected).
Being honest, seeing how excited the kids were was what melted all my worries away!
We’re stepping into this season older, wiser, and somehow more tired. This time around though we are more grounded and have two kids who are already all-in, asking about their baby every day. I think this plot twist is exactly what was meant to happen, and we are so ready for this next chapter!